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Selfish

I've been bee bopping around in my own self-absorbed whirlwind of PTA meetings, school events, fundraisers, job searching, Girl Scout leading and the day-to-day of motherhood. I've been going to the library more with the kids and sitting out in the sun just watching them play. We've skipped a night of homework just to snuggle up with some popcorn and watch Hercules. It's been deliciously wonderful. I've been so engrossed in my own parenting world that I almost feel like my part in creating another family was all a wonderful dream. I almost have to do a double take when I get texts from Baby Mama about little Peanut these days. I come to a screeching halt and go "OMG!! I totally grew a baby a minute ago!" Baby Mama has been absolutely amazing keeping me posted on all her sweet little milestones. I got to see her learning to crawl and getting her first tooth. And I'm starting to realize that I didn't just help create a baby. I actually brought a p
Recent posts

Mother's Day

Last night I slept next to a trash can and the little person who almost 7 years ago made me a mother. Last night that sweet angel laid next to me breathing vomit in my face. Just like when she was an infant, I was jolted awake in the middle of the night by her cries. And when that little creature had to pee I scooped her up and carried her bleary eyed to the potty being careful not to trip over the crutches leaning on the bed. I'd spent my entire Saturday perched on the couch since that sweet cherub picked up a nasty stomach virus in the urgent care waiting room while we were there getting X-rays on her broken foot. It's one thing to have a stomach bug, but it's really upping your game to have a broken foot on top of it so that you can't run to the toilet when you need to barf. I spent 24 hours covered in red Gatorade vomit. And all she wanted in the world was for her mama to hold her. All. Day. And. All. Night. Needless to say I did NOT wake up on Mother's D

Milking It

Well it's been almost a week since the little Sweety arrived, and it's been the quickest week ever! To update on Peanut, she is doing so fabulous. Her family is over the moon in love, and she got to meet one set of grandparents. Baby Mama has been sending me pics and updates, and I absolutely love the turn our friendship has taken. I feel like we're just mom friends now, and it's so freaking great. We've been commiserating together in the wee morning hours via text when she's up feeding and I'm up pumping. Which leads me to my next topic: Pumping.Oh boy. As I've said before I'm a little bit of a lactivist. I'm working on courses to become a lactation consultant for crying out loud. I nursed both my babies until they were "old enough to ask for it," and I kept nursing them well past the age that was socially acceptable. So yeah...I believe in the magic of breastmilk. No doubt. However. I started pumping a few hours after Peanu

Surrogacy's Dirty Little Secret

Ahh I'm finishing up some French toast room service brought me after a nice afternoon nap. I fell asleep eating chocolate and reading some trash mags a friend brought me yesterday. I had a shower this morning with some doTerra soap that made my whole room smell like a spa. Basically I'm being tortured here. Please send help. There's a dirty little secret about surrogacy that I'm going to just spill right here. It's hard to talk about but you've been with me on this journey, so it needs to be said. Recovery from a surrogate birth...is...AWESOME. After I delivered a human being into the arms of her parents, I was whisked away to a bed all by myself. My only care in the world was if I wanted to wear the hospital gown or my own pajamas. Did I want to shower or wait until later? Here's some water, and can we get you anything to eat? I just curled up in bed and melted into the pillow. It was about 2 in the morning when I delivered, and I wasn't aslee

The Birth

Sorry I've been a bit quiet. I've been a little busy. ;) Hmmm..where to start? Well Monday was our midwife appointment, and it was also a very important birthday. My Sweet Pea and Hubs of course! So we went into the midwife, and really the only info I was interested in was if all my witchcraft and yoga poses had worked. Was the baby's head engaged correctly? I was running a bit late because I'd taken Sweet Pea to a big giant inflatable indoor playground with her best buddy for her bday. I went in and immediately got my vitals. The nurse weighed me, and lo and behold the scale finally hit 180! That's my magical birthing weight. Weeks ago when I had my first run of prodromal labor I was at 182. Too much. Then the following two weeks I was 178. Too little. But yesterday I was right at 180. See when I hit 180 lbs, a baby falls out of me. I started my pregnancy with Sunshine at 155. At 180 lbs, she came out. I started my pregnancy with Sweet Pea at 135. When I hi

Baby Watch 2016: Still Pregs

Yep. Still pregnant!  I know you'll want that info up front.  Secondly I need to just shout a big BOOYAH for my instincts! After another really intense bout of prodromal labor I was suspecting that there was a positioning issue preventing us from progressing.  So I stopped into my midwife for a quick check Friday and lo and behold! Baby is coming down head first but asynclitic! That means Peanut descended on the side of HIS or HER head just like my Sunshine. (I know a lot of folks thought they read a lot of "she"s last post but I can assure you we still know bubkiss about the genitals.) So my new goal is to get little Nut to get his head in the game. I went to a friggin amazing chiropractor recommended by my doula. He's like a pregnancy wizard. He adjusted the heck out of me and explained every step. He said my right hip was rolled big time. He tested my mobility in each hip and the difference was crazy.  After he adjusted I could lift both legs equally high, so that

Baby Watch 2016: Night Ninja

Woke up in so much pain I was basically in tears last night. I relaxed my whole body and rode each wave.  I kept the room dark and visualized the baby coming down. It was a painful 3 hours but it did work.  Worked so well everything once again stopped cold.  Went back to bed and woke up to no less than one million texts from people wondering when I'm going to call it and just get the pitocin.  Sorry kids! I'm too much of a hippie.  I know some folks are worried about the baby, but I can assure you peanut is letting me know she's ok. She's moving and grooving just fine. Trying to get comfy I'm sure.  I'm not trying to go for martyrdom. Im not trying to be stubborn. I truly and honestly believe there's a biological reason my labor is starting and stopping. All our Ts need crossed. We just need the perfect storm and there's still a missing element.  My team is fully supportive and amazing. My midwives trust the process. My IPs have the patience of job. My d